oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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