stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
