so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize