She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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