I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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