i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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