Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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