i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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