He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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