Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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