i barfeds in our rink
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
