I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
