If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
