How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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