i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize