so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
i've created a new STD.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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