IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
My breasts were aching with rage.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
