He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize