Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
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