they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
