my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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