Michael Bay diarrhea
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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