You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
