Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
