I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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