We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
