i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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