Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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