6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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