Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize