Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
