i permit you to call me
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
