from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
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