Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
