I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
