we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
