So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
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