I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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