i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
