Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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