I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
