Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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