We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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