these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Randomize
