How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
