I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
