My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Randomize
