We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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