Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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