hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
