Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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